Yesterday I did something I have never done before–I went into my box*, looked at the WOD** and went home. It was a moment of instant frustration and anger plus intimidation–to the point that I didn’t think clearly, got in my car and went on my way. So what happened? What could this WOD have been to make me react like that? Well let’s get some back story first.
Last Saturday I did a Hero WOD with a bunch of running (I ran 2000 meters in total). Then on Wednesday I did a WOD with another 2000 meters in running (side note I ran 800m without stopping which is a first!). Thursday I rowed 2000 meters. My legs were aching and I was hopeful that the workout would incorporate box jumps or jump rope.
Nope. The workout was:
1 mile run
50 overhead squats (RX* 95 pounds)
1 mile run
So my head said “Holy fuck. I can’t run 2 miles tonight.” and immediately went to “A mile run fresh takes me 15 minutes. Those squats will take another 10 minutes, depending on how I feel from that run. Then that last mile might take 20 minutes or more. So this workout is going to take me close to 45 minutes to do, and that’s if I don’t suck hard at the last mile.” And at that moment I got mad, instantly talked myself out of the workout and left. I need to be very clear here: I do not cherry pick my WOD’s. I think you need to work on your weaknesses as much as build on your strengths. It has never bothered me ever to not know what the WOD is, I think the temptation to cherry pick would be higher if people knew what was happening that day.
I am not proud of this moment, but I accept it for what it is.
I went home and called my best friend, and fellow CrossFitter, Allison and gave her the situation. She agreed that the workout was intense, but she reminded me of something that I should have remembered: I could have scaled the workout. I could have run a lower distance and still a great workout in and challenged myself.
I can’t explain why I went straight to anger, why I didn’t try to see a scale, but maybe this is just a good life lesson for me.
I can tell you that my walk-out concerned people at my box. Two people contacted me to see what happened. So that was fun explaining what happened mentally. One of them is an owner and trainer at the gym and told me I was “stronger than that”, but obviously in that moment I wasn’t. She also reminded me I could have scaled the workout. The other was the epitome of what going to CrossFit is all about–he was supportive, complimentary and not judgmental about it at all.
I plan to be business as usual Monday, but I wanted to share that I am not perfect, that this is a true life lesson and maybe someone can learn from this experience through me and not do what I did.
* Box = gym
** WOD = Workout of the Day
* RX = prescribed weight