At my boot camp session this morning, the trainer brought up a really good point that she had done time and time before, but something this morning made it click for me. She discussed the attributes it takes to be personally responsible for yourself and your actions. Through my weight loss journey I have always discussed how I have struggled with the eating portion of this, how I find myself struggling with saying no to sweets and eating, on a consistent basis, in clean fashion. For some reason today’s talk made me realize that I have been holding onto the crutch of giving myself allowances for eating poorly. “I am tired”, “I like sweets too much”, “I didn’t prepare in advance”, etc. Now I am not going to tear down the work I have done diet-wise over the past yer–how I eat is much better than a year go–much better!! But I still allow myself too much leeway when it comes to sweet things. I fall into a pattern quickly where I allow myself to eat, like right now, a lot of ice cream. There is a Marble Slab Creamery right where I work and I like to go in there on my break or at the end of my shift and grab a small thing of mint ice cream. What started out as something small has blossomed into a pattern of almost every shift I will do it, which is now verging on excessive. I need to dial it back and make it a treat and not an everyday experience.
As I go through this experience, I feel myself growing as a person. The lesson I want to work on now is being able to take personal responsibility for all my actions. Not to say something I know is a destructive behaviour is ok to do. This might be the biggest lesson for me. I encourage everyone around me to support me in this and to join me in leaving excuses behind and being responsible for all your actions.