I have started this journal to be an honest reflection of my weight loss journey.  I feel that some people gloss over things or try to present a too-perfect travel in their weight loss journey. I am just not like that. I want a place to vent about missing chocolate! A place where I can lament over going to the gym or for a walk. I know I like doing those things but I am never, ever motivated to do them. And if I am doing well, I am also going to discuss that! Because I plan on having many victories!!

So I went back to my nutritionist (Nikki) last Saturday. And I got weighed for the first time in two years or more. And I was stunned at how much weight I had gained! I felt shamed, and ashamed of myself for letting it get this far. Had I honestly looked in the mirror these many months and not realized how much weight was slowly going onto my body? It was the wake-up call I needed to be inspired to change the way I was eating.

Here is what my nutritionist is setting before me to eat: 2-3 protiens a day (fish, chicken, beef, eggs, peanut butter, milk) 2-3 carbs a day (bread, pasta, crackers, etc.) 2-3 fruits and unlimited veggies. Limited fats, like oils to cook with and butter or mayo. 64 oz of water (8 glasses) Now this is a healthy diet, no punches. But I work in retail–a job in which, as a store manager, I struggle to eat at, because I am alone so much of the time. I do not have access to a microwave all the time, I am surrounded by candy and chips and pop. Plus I am serving customers a lot and running the store, so I don’t always have the opportunity to stop and eat. In fact, it’s rare that I can stop and eat. So when I get home at night I am ravenous! I could eat the entire house!! And my decision making abilities disappear when I am like that.

So I am starting off with baby steps. I started the program. I kept to it every day this week, and the first few days were totally fine! I was drinking 12 glasses of water a day, I wasn’t eating any chocolate, and I had my meals all planned in advance. And I think that’s the key for me–I have to plan my meals or else I will fall spectacularly off the wagon. And so that was what I did this week to succeed. When I met with Nikki (actually Linda) on Tuesday I had lost 3.2 pounds since Saturday. And when I weighed in today I had lost another 1.4 pounds for a total of 4.6 pounds in a week!!! I am proud. It took a lot of hard work. It took planning. It took dedication, and I peed a LOT!!!

So today I feel good. I feel I am on the path. And I am still unsure as to how I feel about the gym….